Kasut Span Hitam

Dari jauh aku melihat kau bahagia... mengharapkan aku dapat menjadi sebahagian dari kebahagiaan itu... tapi itu dulu... semuanya kisah lalu... kisah sewaktu kau dan aku...

pernah kau kata tanpa doaku pun kau kan bahagia... menikmati setiap saat kehidupan di dunia...

dan dalam waktu itu aku merana... kerana aku kecewa... kemudiannya kau cela... tapi aku rela.. aku terima... kerana perasaan kasih itu masih ada... waktu itu.. harapan ku cuma mahu melihat kau bahagia...

tapi kini waktu dah berlalu... banyak perubahan dah berlaku... aku sedikit pun tak pernah kau perlu... dan aku teringat kata2 mu... tiada tempat aku disisi mu... dan diriku telah lama mati...

aku tak mahu lagi hidup mengenangkan kisah yang lalu... aku ingin maju... bergerak ke depan dan membuat keputusan... tanpa lagi menghiraukan... bayang-bayang dan kenangan...

disini... telah aku ketemukan sebuah erti... terbuka hati untuk bercinta lagi... dia datang bukan lah sebagai seorang pengganti... tetapi seseorang yang memahami isi hati, diri dan jiwa ini... sesuatu yang kau xpernah beri... hari ini aku bebaskan kau pergi... jauh dari minda dan hati ini... semoga kau jumpa apa yang kau cari... dan kita.. xpernah akan bertemu lagi...

Maybe I do know what I want...
Maybe I don't... Maybe what I feel is real...
But what I see is clouded by bushes of trees...
Life is a journey of discovery... you learn it when you reach the end...

I like my discovery to be a mystery.. instead of a written story...
My only hope is that I discover you in my journey..
so that we could be together for eternity... =)

Coretan Malam

kadang kala orang tanya kenapa.... mereka mempersoalkan tindakan kita... kerena pada kaca mata mereka... ada yang kurang.. ada yang tak kena...

maunya tidak orang bertanya... apabila tindakan kita menjangkau batasan dan kebolehan kita di luar imiginasi mereka....

Biarlah mereka dengan kata-kata dan tanggapan mereka... Mereka hanya mampu memberi pandangan... jauh sekali ada yang akan memberi cadangan untuk penyelesaian... kerana hanya diri yang mengalami mampu merasai sejauh mana berbaloinya apa yang telah dikorbankan...

Aku terus.. dan terus sahaja menunggu... sampai satu tempoh yang aku sendiri tak tahu... tapi aku pasti... akhirnya aku akan dapat jawapan yang aku cari... Penantian ini tidak akan dipersiakan... walau masih lagi diperingkat permulaan... kerana setia.. tetap ingin aku korbankan...

sudden bla... bla...

I can't seem to write anything for now.... my mind seems to be on a lot of things...
so my contents would be worthless for anyone's reading...

Mix feelings.... love,confius,miss,adored,bless... far away from ever feeling hate... I think that's a good sign... for its been a while since I felt hate... but still... what is this displeasure I'm feeling... why isn't there any satisfaction for what I'm doing.... why do I feel like I'm missing something...

The new year offers me a new start... I've took that opportunity.... and change what ever that is around me... including my personality.... I'm not changing into someone I'm not... I'm just bringing out the evil in me that people don't often see... and things started to suprise me...

Being silent and doing something is a lot better then being loud without getting anything done... I'm pleased in my current life as I found many that acknowledge my capability... and recognized me as somebody... not that previously I was a nobody.... it's just that in the past... people often mistaken my true personality...

well its my fault actually... I was the one that put my image of me in their minds that leads them to think of me with certain quality... when I acted differently... they freakout occasionally...


"people... don't be quick to drop your judgement on people"

Identity that defines me

I try to find that Identity
The identity that defines me
Who I am, not who I want to be
But it seems so impossible for me

I want so much to be good
That should be my attitude
But I always end up being bad
Because I often made people sad

What goes around comes around
But my Identity is yet to be found
It has left me feeling down
So far on the ground

I wish I'm not like this
I wish I could stop being psst...
I need to see a specialist...

Mimpi si pari-pari

Duhai si pari-pari...

Andainya tidur malam mu di hiasi mimpi...

Doaku ia mimpi yang terindah pernah kau alami...

Dan pabila tibanya waktu pagi...

Wajahmu tersenyum melihat mentari...

Agar duka semalam hilang...

Menjadikan kau lebih matang...

Bangkit dari perasaan kecundang...

Lalu semakin tabah menghadapi hari-hari mendatang...

Duhai si pari-pari...

Aku ada bila kau perlukan ku disisi...

Terus setia untuk menemani...

Hingga suatu hari nanti...

Aku tidak kau perlukan lagi...

♫♪♫ ♫♪♫ ♫♪♫

It starts with a magical night... thats was before all the fight... before we become so uptight...

Do you still remember that magical night?... Where the moon and the stars shines so bright... it's like being circled by a magical light....
When I held your hand as you stayed close by my side... I was walking blind and you were my guide....

As we were walking... and you keep on talking... My mind just block itself from thinking... because it could only understand one thing... you're the most beautiful thing...

You hug me close.. and rest your head on my chest... I was suprise ... my heart was beating fast... After a while.. I felt that this is something that would last....

Boy was I wrong... it ain't nothing like those love songs... we were together... but it was not meant to be forever... you said that it would be for the better... and in an istant... everything is over...

I guest that I'm to blame... as I'm the one that brings you shame...
I was from the wild and not easy to tame...

It's not that i dont love you no more... I love you enough to let you go...
I could never love another as I love you... because that type of love is only when I was with you...

I treatend to be in regret.. but the truth is I can never forget...
you wipeout my past and created a future.. made me believe we had a life together... But it didn't happen as planned... and now I'm nothing but just a man... you've erase me like I was some mistake on paper... where you could rub it off later...
and so now I except my fate... that I'm the one you hate... for me to be dead to you would be great...

When you look around... and I'm no where to be found... you know you're on your own.. because I'm already gone...